A favorite bridal story of mine isn’t even mine (for shame!).
I can recall an evening my husband and I were watching television at my in-law’s (we don’t won a TV for a reason- there is trash on it!) when we paused on a bridal show.
The bride’s husband-to-be’s father had a heart condition that landed him in the hospital two nights before the wedding. She yelled at her groom-to-be, asking if she was just supposed to postpone her wedding because he was sick. The groom assured her this was not the case, and, after much ado and fuss over her, the groom’s father checked out of the hospital the morning of the wedding and was able to attend- happy as any man can be when watching his son go off with a psychotic woman.
Although this is not always the case, as I am well aware of the way television makes someone the bad guy and someone the good guy, there was no good way I could see this story to be spun to make the bride look better. She was self-centered and self-righteous about her big day.
How do planners stop this behavior? We never let it start.
I, personally, like to remind the bride that I am here for her every whim, but coffee at 2am is not a whim, and I am never hired as a personal whipping-girl.
Some brides need to be debarked to nip their bite!
My advice to the maids, moms and grooms:
Remind the beautiful, blushing bride that she looks like a furious raccoon with no sleep and sounds like a spitting banshee in the night when she is flustered. Let her know and assure her that you want to help and would love a list of “to-dos” to make her life easier. Don’t give up too much ground, or you’ll end up giving a mile, but remember your own special day or think of how perfect you want everything to go for her- even if it all sounds like a crock to you- keep things on a more than civil basis to avoid the all out bite of bridezilla. Why? Because bridezilla can alienate friends and family so far during the planning process that by 11pm wedding night, all her friends have left the party and never call again. Nobody wants a war- so squelch the battles.